How to Challenge the Fear of Public Speaking with Frances Cahill.

Welcome to Public Speaking with Peter George. Do you want to be calm, confident, and credible every time you speak in public? Then stay tuned as we discuss public speaking tips, techniques, and tactics that help you increase your impact, influence, and income.

Public speaking may not be the greatest fear in the world, but it scares a great many people. Some get nervous presenting to large groups, while others break into a sweat at the mere thought of speaking to even a small one. But as my guest Frances Cahill will tell you, it doesn't have to be this way. Frances has built her reputation over 40 years working under the motto: with humor and warmth, I will convince you that public speaking is not a death sentence, ever. She's a wordsmith and business communication specialist who has trained staff in public administration, worked for Radio 2EA and SBS TV in Australia, and crafted programs that combine communication principles and theatrical techniques to help people tell their story with confidence and clarity. Here's my conversation with Frances Cahill.

What Is Glossophobia?

Peter: Frances, can you explain to us what exactly is glossophobia?

Frances: Glossophobia is the younger sibling of social anxiety — it's the fear someone has of speaking in public. And we can take it one step further and say it's the fear of not meeting expectations when speaking in public. People are terribly frightened of public speaking. Many would have no idea what glossophobic even meant — but at least it'd be a conversation starter.

Peter: You said it's not just the fear of public speaking, but really the fear of how you'll be judged when you're speaking. Is that right?

Frances: Yes, absolutely. When I ask clients what they most fear, the answers are always the same: I'm frightened of looking like an idiot. I'm frightened I won't finish a sentence. What if they don't like me? In the person's mind, they've constructed a set of expectations they believe the audience has for them — and then they're frightened of not meeting those expectations. So I make an effort to break it down. What exactly are you frightened of? And how can we chip away at those blocks so you can say: okay, I can do this. Because when we examine the fear closely, we almost always find it wasn't rational. There's a way to get around it.

A lot of this comes from our drive to be perfect. What if I make a mistake? What if I forget what I'm going to say? But here's the thing — no one knows what you're going to say until it comes out of your mouth. So how can you get it wrong? And as for whether they'll like you, well — what are you there for? Are you there to be liked, or are you there to deliver a message?

I worked with a man who delivered safety messages in an industrial environment — warnings about chemicals and the like. He said, what if they don't like me? I said, I would much prefer they don't like you, but they stay alive. That reframed it for him immediately. What you're delivering is life-saving information. Whether they like you is considerably less important.

Peter: A public speaking trainer told me many years ago: better that your message is remembered than your name is remembered.

Frances: Perfect. Absolutely. If you believe in your message and it's going to make a difference — however you deliver it, whether smoothly or imperfectly — that message is what should be pulling you through. These people need to know this. I have a contribution to make.

The World's Safest Activity

Peter: You've said that public speaking is actually the safest activity in the world. Make the case.

Frances: In the entire history of humankind, no one has ever had a death certificate registered as "cause of death: public speaking." No one has died from speaking in public. You might have a very fast heart rate. You might breathe shallowly. You might feel faint. But none of those things are caused by the act of speaking in public — they're your body's response to the perceived threat. The speaking itself is perfectly safe.

Peter: And those physical responses — the racing heart, the elevated blood pressure — aren't those the same responses an athlete has just before competing at a high level?

Frances: Exactly right. High-level athletes marshal that same fight-or-flight response — but they channel it toward something. They're not flying away. They're flying toward. It's the same energy. The question is what you do with it.

Where the Fear Really Comes From

Frances: The main trigger for this fear response is usually something the body and mind remember from the past. I'd estimate that about half of the clients I've worked with trace their fear of public speaking in adulthood back to a moment in elementary school — an oral presentation that went badly, a teacher who didn't step in when they started to falter, a classroom that laughed. At that tender age, being ridiculed for not finishing or freezing up leaves a mark. And the body and mind carry that forward into every speaking situation since.

But you're not that child anymore. The work isn't about revisiting the trauma — it's about examining what it is you're actually frightened of now. No one is going to throw crockery at you. Depending on where you're speaking, you're generally quite safe. Drilling down to what's really generating that fear response — that's where the work begins.

Peter: I completely understand this. I grew up introverted and shy. And I've been playing guitar for over 50 years — started when I was very young. But in fifth grade, I was on stage at a school talent show and completely fell apart playing the Beatles' "Hey Jude." I have never played in front of anyone other than my wife since. I get it. The difference is that I can make that choice and it doesn't affect my life. When speaking is tied to your career or your business, that's a different story entirely.

Frances: Exactly. And there's so much the world misses out on when fear wins. Everyone has a contribution to make. Everyone is entitled to an opinion and to be treated with dignity. Being sure you have something to say — and being able to share it when you want to or need to — is far more important than most people give it credit for.

From Fear to Confidence

Peter: For people who have this fear — will it always stick with them?

Frances: It depends. I'm careful to note that I don't take on clients with clinical anxiety — I'm not a psychologist, and that level requires proper treatment. But for those who are experiencing the social side of speaking fear, the answer is: it doesn't have to be debilitating. There will likely always be some level of alertness before you speak — and honestly, I think that's a good thing. Getting ready for this conversation with you, Peter, I went through my own steps: what's the message I want to give, how do I want to show up? That kind of mindful preparation is healthy.

I've performed on stage for many years and I still feel something when I first step out. What matters is the difference between performance enhancement and performance debility. That shot of adrenaline just before you go on? I love it. It's pumping me up and getting me where I need to be. The day I stop feeling it, I think I'll stop speaking.

Peter: I look at it the same way — it's going toward something, not away from something. And once people experience that energy in the room, within themselves, it's addictive.

Frances: Very addictive. I worked with a client who had to give a single presentation and was an absolute nervous wreck. We worked on both managing her nerves and developing her content. I told her beforehand: one of three things is going to happen. You'll come down and say it went fine, but never again. Or you'll confirm it was as horrible as you feared, and never again. Or you'll say you can't wait to do it again. She came back to the table and said: that was fantastic. I can't wait for next time. That fire in a client's eyes — that moment when you know they've got it — that's the cream on the cake for me.

The Magic Three Steps

Peter: For those who won't seek out help, are there steps they can take on their own?

Frances: Absolutely. I have six steps in my full program, but for someone in business — particularly in a networking context or introducing themselves and their work — I focus on what I call the Magic Three.

Step one: Know your why. Not just why you're getting up to speak, but why you're in business. What is the individual experience you want to create for each client? That's the foundation.

Step two: Know your role. You don't have to be an expert speaker — but you are absolutely the expert on your business. I worked with a man in pest control who would walk up deadpan and say, "My name is Peter, and I deal in death." The room went silent. Then he said, "The death of your termites." The whole room broke up. That's him stepping into his role. What role are you taking? The dentist who gives people back their smile? The financial advisor who protects people's futures? Know what you do for each client and own it.

Step three: Love your voice. Whatever voice you have — and unless you're planning two years of speech pathology therapy, it's the voice you've got — there are things you can do with stance, articulation, breathing, and projection that build genuine, personal confidence. When you stand up knowing why you're there, the role you're stepping into, and that you can speak clearly and be heard, it gets a lot simpler.

Peter: Three great steps. Frances, where can listeners find you and learn more?

Frances: You can get free downloads on my website at franciscarl.com.au. I'd also really love for people to join my Speak Easy Club group on Facebook — it's free, and every day there's a tip that can help you move forward, whether that's speaking up at a PTA meeting, presenting in a boardroom, or ordering a drink at the pub with confidence. Something every single day. That's the main thing I want people to take away: there are gentle, safe steps you can take, and you don't have to do anything you're not ready for.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Public Speaking with Peter George. Are you ready to be calm, confident, and credible every time you speak in public? Then visit petergeorgepublicspeaking.com and let's make it happen. I'll see you next time.