How to Hack Your Fear of Public Speaking with Mike Acker.

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The fear of public speaking is so pervasive that many — if not most — books on the subject include a chapter on it. But Mike Acker's book, Speak With No Fear, is different. It focuses entirely on overcoming the fear of public speaking so you can accomplish what you want in life, even if that's never standing in front of an audience. Mike is an executive and communication coach, a keynote speaker, and the author of four books, including the best-selling Speak With No Fear — designated the number one book on overcoming the fear of public speaking by Forbes. Here's my conversation with Mike Acker.

Why He Wrote Speak With No Fear

Peter: Mike, what made you decide to write a book called Speak With No Fear?

Mike: Again and again, when I would meet with people — corporate clients, personal clients — they would ask: how do I get over my fear of speaking? I'm just so nervous all the time. Extreme cases of people pretending their Zoom had crashed because they were that nervous. It was the most repeated, most frequently asked question I received. At the time I was actually full-time in corporate America, Fortune 500, consultative sales. Part of writing the book was me trying to escape answering the same question over and over. I thought I'd just write it in a book and give it to people. That backfired — the book went viral, and now more people call me about that topic than ever. But I love it.

Where You Are Is Not Where You Stay

Peter: Listening to your book, I hear you say: where you are is not where you stay. Why is that so important to you?

Mike: We have to have faith that we can improve. So many people say: I've just always been this way, I can't change. I was working with a CEO who hired me, and then shortly after said he just couldn't do it. He didn't have that faith. And if you don't believe you can get good at something, you're not going to try. All improvement in any area of life starts with faith that you can improve. Just because you're nervous, have a speech impediment — like I did — or English is your second language — like I experienced living in Mexico — you don't have to stay there. That's a theme that runs throughout everything I write.

Why Fear Is So Prevalent

Peter: Why do you think fear is so prevalent when it comes to speaking?

Mike: Fear is the reaction to the unknown, or to something we think is going to go wrong. When we're at the edge of a cliff, we fear falling. With spiders, we fear being harmed. In speaking, there are so many unknowns: I could fail. I could look like an idiot. I could be rejected. It's a natural emotional reaction to the uncertainty of what could go wrong. And what's interesting is that most people are focused on the negatives rather than the positives. In my book, I suggest imagining the worst — putting every possible negative outcome down in detail — and then doing the same with the positives. The shelf life of a positive outcome is far, far longer than the negatives. You might look like an idiot. How long does that stay with you? A week? You might get promoted. How long does that stay with you? Potentially the rest of your life.

It's Not About You

Peter: One of the seven strategies in the book is that it's not about us. Can you explain what you mean by that?

Mike: Remember middle school dances — all the boys on one side, all the girls on the other, and nobody crossing the floor? The reason was that everyone was thinking: what are they going to think about me? That same middle school dilemma follows us into adult life. What are they going to think about me? But the reality is that no one is thinking about you. They're too busy thinking about themselves. You've got a room full of people wondering what everyone else thinks of them — and everyone is doing the exact same thing. I'll be a better speaker if, instead of thinking about what you're thinking about me, I think about how I can serve you. How can I add value to Peter's audience? How can I transfer a skill they need? When you put the focus on yourself — the I, I, I, me, me, me — that's an awful lot of weight to carry.

The Two Weights of Speaking

Mike: When you're speaking, you're always carrying two weights. Think about lifting a ten-pound barbell at your bicep — not very difficult. Now push that same weight straight out in front of you, arm fully extended. All of a sudden, it's very heavy. The further from your body, the heavier it becomes.

The first weight is the weight of content. The better you know your material, the closer it is to the chest, the easier it is to carry. Ask me to speak about nuclear fission and I'm going to shake. Have me speak about what I'm talking about right now? I've coached on it, written it, delivered it hundreds of times. That content is close.

The second weight is the weight of personhood — of being you. If I'm trying to be someone else, the weight extends further and further out, and I can't hold it long. But if I bring who I actually am, that weight is completely manageable. I worked with a major in the military who wanted to become a great speaker. When I asked her who she wanted to be like, she described someone 20 years older — tall, commanding, masculine, pure authority. Then I asked her to describe herself. Athletic, sharp, someone who takes time before she speaks. I said: you're trying to be someone who doesn't fit you. You'll always be a poor imitation of someone else, but you can be the best version of you.

Why the Book Skips Presentation Mechanics

Peter: Speak With No Fear doesn't include presentation skills or speech writing. Why not?

Mike: I wanted to keep it very focused — motivational and strategic. A lot of people just need to be told they can. It's like the little engine that could. Sometimes I'll work with a client and simply say: you can do this, I believe in you. There are plenty of books that cover how to stand, how to use your hands, all of that. There aren't many that zero in entirely on overcoming the fear. And it's resonated — I've had people reach out from every continent saying it changed them. Someone in the audio version said: if this guy can become a good public speaker, anyone can. And that's exactly the point. Anyone can.

Smile, Pause, and Breathe

Peter: You frequently talk about smile, pause, and breathe. Why?

Mike: These three things will solve the majority of speaking problems. Pause first — just slow down and create some gaps. If you want to eliminate fillers, pausing is the way. People use fillers because there's a gap between sentences and instead of letting it exist, they fill it with uh or so or like. A pause removes the filler. If you don't know how to pause, read a book out loud and let the commas, periods, and paragraph breaks teach you.

Pauses also let you breathe. When people try to take a big deep breath before going on stage, it can actually intensify nerves — all that air becomes anxious energy. What helps is the exhale. Breathe all the way out. That's where the nerves leave. And smile. Smiling releases neuropeptides into your system that literally make you feel better. If you're at a five on a one-to-ten scale, some time spent smiling will move the needle.

Growing Up in Mexico

Peter: You grew up in Mexico. How did that experience shape your communication and leadership?

Mike: Many of my clients come from other countries, and English is their second language. When I spoke up in class in Mexico, my heavily accented Spanish got laughed at — and I leaned into being the class clown. That experience gives me genuine empathy for the people I work with. I've been there. It also taught me to persevere. Just because I wasn't taken seriously doesn't mean I had to stay there. I eventually got accepted to the top law school in Mexico. And growing up in a different culture gave me perspective — my worldview isn't the only one. There are other points of view, and mine isn't necessarily the correct one. My wife says that all the time.

Peter: Mike, how can listeners find your books and learn more about you?

Mike: Search Mike Acker on Google and I show up on the whole first page. Go to mikeacker.com — it's like hacker without the H — and you can find everything there, including Speak With No Fear and all of my other books on Amazon.

Thank you for listening to this episode of Public Speaking with Peter George. Are you ready to be calm, confident, and credible every time you speak in public? Then visit petergeorgepublicspeaking.com and let's make it happen. I'll see you next time.